Friday, May 26, 2006

Connect with people where it matters.

Connect with people where it matters.

A lesson from my friend Maxine Clark, Founder and Chief Executive Bear of Build-A-Bear Workshop, in her new book THE BEAR NECESSITIES OF BUSINESS: Building A Company With Heart.

"I have many good friends. If you gathered them all in one room, I'm sure they'd look like a mismatched bunch. Young and old. Men and women. Children and adults. Sophisticated and simple. Tall and short. Well educated and only street smart. Democrats and Republicans.

"But where it matters -- on the inside -- they're very much alike. And that's where I connect with them. They are my friends because we share common values, interests, experiences, and passions. They care about and believe in the same things that I do. And, like me, they have heart.

"My friendships have shown me how important it is to look inside to find out what people really stand for. That's crucial when you're choosing people to welcome into your life. It's essential when selecting employees for your company as well."

Connect with people where it matters -- the heart.

And check out Maxine's book. We can all learn a lot from her.

THE BEAR NECESSITIES OF BUSINESS: Building A Company With Heart

Warmest,
Keith Ferrazzi
Visit NeverEatAlone.com

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Make the Pain Stop! by Mark Joyner

Monday, May 08, 2006

NLP: Down To Business - Peter Freeth

Book Shaker - Articles - Business Growth - NLP: Down To Business - Peter Freeth

As I look around the NLP training industry, I see a number
of established and well known training providers moving into
corporate consultancy under the guise of "organisational
psychology" and other similar concepts. It strikes me that
they've realised there is more money in corporate training
than in their more therapeutically oriented, privately
funded customers and now they're trying to make NLP credible
in a business context. I think that they are missing the
point: it already is.

I suppose my route into NLP has biased me towards its
business applications. My first exposure was on an internal
sales training course at a major telecoms company, where the
training school was run by a NLP Master Practitioner which,
in 1993, was unusual in the UK. The three day course became
a cult and anyone who could get on the course did. This cult
status was fuelled by many intriguing stories, such as the
sales team who used non-verbal rapport to influence their
sales manager. During each weekly sales meeting, the manager
intended to give the sales staff a hard time about their
figures. At the end of the meeting he felt inexplicably good
about not having done it. How could you resist finding out
more about that?

From that moment on, I used what I knew about NLP every day
- in sales meetings, in team meetings and in just about
every way you could imagine. I was lucky in being able to
get the tools and techniques of NLP out of my system early
on and instead concentrate on results. No-one cares about
swishes or six step reframes - they just want whatever they
want.

I started with just a few simple ideas that I used
regularly. At first, I paid attention to the language that
my customers used and when I wrote proposals for them, I
used their sensory language. That also came in very handy in
job interviews too and really enhanced my ability to build
rapport quickly. After job interviews, I also wrote follow-
up letters in the sensory style of the interviewing manager,
and they were always amazed and impressed. Of course, the
fact that I bothered to write a follow-up letter was the
most important thing. The language I used just made it more
powerful. If you don't bother to get the basics right, no
amount of NLP wizardry will help you.

I have come to think of NLP as an operating system. By
itself it doesn't do anything useful. Only the applications
you run on it are useful. Consequently, it's very difficult
for companies like Microsoft to sell operating systems, so
they partner with PC hardware manufacturers. Similarly, I
have found that my NLP skills enable far more useful
applications such as facilitation, conflict resolution and
problem solving. These are good old fashioned consultancy
services that clients are happy to pay money for. Are
clients happy to pay money for NLP? None that I have ever
met.

The point is that being a NLP Practitioner is in itself not
a living, but it does enable you to do something else more
effectively. For example, if you're a good salesperson you
could become an amazing salesperson. If you're an effective
manager you could become an inspiring manager. You need an
application to run on your NLP operating system.

I see many people who want to become coaches or NLP trainers
themselves and, of course, this is excellent because they
are excited about their new skills and want to use them to
help other people. Unfortunately, they overlook the basics
of running a business and all too often fail to realise
their dream. This is a great pity, and I think there's a
responsibility on the people selling NLP and coaching
training to point this out before they take your money.

When the time came for me to leave the telecoms industry and
set up my own business, I knew that NLP would be a part of
it as I saw the basic skills as being highly transferable
and without a shelf life. Technical skills such as IT
knowledge have a shelf life - if you don't keep up with the
latest thing, your knowledge quickly becomes worthless. The
great thing about NLP is that the core modelling toolkit
means you can be constantly developing and refining new
models of excellence to form the basis of your consultancy,
training or coaching work.

For example, about a year ago I worked with a number of
sales people on the problem of cold calling. I learned a
huge amount from them, and that experience created a little
niche for me, and I ended up writing a series of articles
for a recruitment magazine called "How to love your sales
calls".

So why do I say that NLP is already credible in business?
Because the client doesn't need to know that what you're
doing is NLP, or TA, or SDI, or whatever the latest thing
is. They just want to work with a professional who can get
results. On the NLP Practitioner courses I co-train, I
really enjoy working with the people who come from a broad
cross section of industries and want to learn a new set of
skills to help them be better at their jobs. I admire the
fact that they don't all want to become coaches, they just
want to be better managers, IT directors, project managers,
engineers or sales people. They see NLP as the answer to
their development needs because they have reached the level
where they know what they need to do, they just don't seem
to be able to do it.

You might be hoping I'll share some examples of some
business applications of NLP, so I will. Let's start with
logical levels. This is one of the most useful conflict
resolution tools I have ever used. You simply listen to the
level at which the people in conflict are thinking and then
keep moving up until they agree.

Six step reframing is an excellent framework for changing
organisational behaviour. If you translate 'part' into
'department' then it fits perfectly! It's ideal for changing
those bad habits that companies get into yet can't seem to
get out of, no matter how much everyone wants to. In fact,
my book Change Magic grew from this seed.

I ran some in house training for a recruitment company last
year, and now one of the consultants anchors positive states
in her clients and candidates by touching them on the arm!
It's amazing how many people try anchoring on the training
course and then decide they would never use it in 'real
life', because the people who do use it are able to do so
elegantly and tactfully and get great results. Are you
thinking she is being manipulative? Why? Think of someone
you know who is very popular and who tends to make people
feel good. I bet they anchor all the time, but they don't
know they're doing it. This recruitment consultant is doing
it purposefully, so she can get consistent results which are
better for her, her clients and her candidates. As a
professional, she is using all her skills and knowledge to
be as effective as possible. That's where I see people get
the most benefit from NLP training.

And now for my favourite - the swish. On the NLP
Practitioner course, the swish is demonstrated and learned
as a phobia cure, replacing an old image with a new one
whilst the Practitioner waves their arms and makes a
'whoosh' sound. Most of the delegates feel a bit silly
trying the swish, and even if they are successful on the
training course, they often say that they can't imagine how
they could ever use it in the outside world. And then, just
when they've written it off, I show them how the swish
really works and they love it! They all run off saying "I'm
going to do that next week!"

Every single time you read a report or proposal, use a
flipchart of whiteboard or write on a notepad, you have the
potential to use a swish pattern to reset expectations, wipe
away unhelpful thoughts or states and swap ideas and
concepts around in someone's mind. Now, I feel like I have
developed this application of the swish after a lot of hard
work, so I'm wary about giving away the trade secrets that
I've invested so much of my own creativity in. On the other
hand, I trust you, as a member of the worldwide NLP
community, to keep this to yourself. You could think of this
as a magic trick, and I'm only allowed to tell you about it
if you're in the 'inner circle'.

Imagine you're in a meeting and your customer has a lot of
complaints. You say "these are really important points so I
want to capture them to make sure we address them". That's
pacing, by the way. Then you move to the flipchart. Start
writing down the complaints as the customer just reels them
off, as if they are just pouring out their problems. When
you get about two-thirds down the page, stop and review what
you have so far to really amplify the customer's state. Then
tear the page off, right in front of them. "Whoosh". Screw
the paper into a ball and throw it over the customer so it
lands behind them, in their past. Then, while they are still
on pause, say "Sorry, I did that all wrong. Tell me what it
is you want to happen" and start again, this time focussing
the customer on positive outcomes rather than complaints.
It's important they get those off their chest, but they
don't help anyone to solve the problems.

Another great way to use this is on a notepad, which means
you can do it anywhere. It's ideal for moving someone out of
a stuck state, which is often the case if they have a number
of problems or complaints on their mind.

Here's another version, which you can combine with spatial
anchoring when comparing your product or service with a
competitors. You simply list the customer's problems on
flipchart A and their needs on flipchart B. When you turn
the pages to do your comparison…well, you can guess which
flipchart you use for which. It's useful, whilst writing
down your comparison points, to flip back and forth between
your features and the customer's needs, and your
competitor's features and the customer's problems.

And of course, if you're using a whiteboard, you can simply
wipe away all the problems.

I often use a swish at the start of a training course, when
I want to get rid of any preconceptions and start with a
clean slate. I'll start by pacing the audience's
expectations and then when the flipchart is almost full I'll
tear it off, throw it away and tell them how the course will
really be. I can even hear the sighs of relief as the
audience realises how the course will be so much better than
they had expected.

Overall, I would say the single most important and valuable
NLP skill I have is modelling. NLP, at its core, is only
modelling. All of the tools and techniques you learn on a
NLP course are simply useful ways to demonstrate and learn
the techniques, but they're not necessarily the best way to
get results outside of the training room. Do you drive the
way your driving instructor taught you to? Same thing.

The techniques of NLP are the result of Bandler and
Grinder's modelling projects. Does that mean that Milton
Erickson was the only person to use influential language? Of
course not. I've met people who naturally set goals at least
as powerfully as you could with Well Formed Outcomes. I
consider myself very fortunate that I've been able to model
so many people. I learn something new from every client I
work with, because I am always open to the myriad of ways
that ordinary people achieve amazing things. Whether it's
someone motivating themselves to train for a marathon or
someone motivating themselves to make sales calls, everyone
I work with has valuable skills that I can learn. That for
me is the real power of NLP.

So, NLP is already credible and acceptable in business
simply because business is about people. I often say that
words like 'company' or 'organisation' are simply collective
nouns for groups of people, acting for a common purpose.
They're no different to any other people. If you want to
apply NLP in business then realise that people are already
communicating, relating, influencing and learning in
businesses. Using NLP, you can make those natural processes
even more powerful and effective.

I hear from a lot of people in companies who say "we don't
use NLP, it doesn't work for us" and I know they are missing
out on a great opportunity because they already are using
NLP, it's just hidden inside other services. Whilst HR
managers may resist NLP because they only see the
techniques, there's a revolution starting from within that
promises to make NLP a mainstream business development
toolkit.

At the moment, much of NLP is hidden inside other training
courses, consultancy models and professional services. It
doesn't really matter whether the customer knows there's NLP
in there or not as long as they continue to get the
professional service they want, the value they expect and
the results they need. As I learned on my first customer
service course, 20 years ago, "people don't care how much
you know until they know how much you care".

Perhaps, in the past, people have tried to sell NLP without
knowing what it does. They've been like the presenters on
home shopping channels rambling on and on about how
wonderful something is without ever saying what it will do
for me, or what will happen if I buy it. Many coaches don't
know how to sell coaching, so they offer free taster
sessions. That's all changing now, because established
professionals are learning about and applying NLP in the
course of their work. Accountants, lawyers, sales people, IT
directors and CEOs are learning about NLP because they want
to be better at their jobs, not because they want to become
coaches.

As a global professional community, it's our responsibility
and our privilege to apply NLP in businesses to solve real
business problems and help business people develop real,
practical business skills. It's our responsibility to take
the spirit of NLP and adapt it to our customer's needs, not
just to take the techniques out of the Practitioner manual
and hope for the best. It's our responsibility to honour
NLP's spirit of curiosity and to use that as the basis for
our professional development, not just to say "I know how to
do NLP" because you can remember all seven steps of the six
step reframe.

NLP has the potential to offer the first significant upgrade
to the human operating system that powers businesses since
the industrial revolution. I believe that NLP offers us the
chance to create a business development infrastructure based
on open communication, focussed results and truly meaningful
relationships. With the power of NLP behind you, you have
both the credibility and the proven potential to make a
powerful difference in business. The rest is up to you.

=======================================
Peter Freeth is a leading business coach,
author and mentor. Get Peter's books on
NLP for business and personal success at
http://www.bookshaker.com